what will happen

the act of moving on with my life is hard to grasp
the motions may all be taking place but the reality has not started to sink in
the bedding is being bought
the rugs, the pillows, the blankets
the ideas for appliances in the kitchen
the living room
oh, and the bathroom
the closet
college life shall be a leap of faith
the idea feels so surreal, so far away..
when in truth, its just down the street and around the corner a little ways

the idea of BEING ON MY OWN
with no parental guidance
IS SO FREEING AND WONDERFUL
but at the same time really scary, along with shorts bursts of manic moments that contain the words HOLY HELL, HOW?

the idea of leaving friends
and of friends leaving you
is sad, and heart wrenching
these bonds i've created, i don't want to break them
who knows if i'll get to see them again
but hey, nowadays there is the internet, and skype
THANK GOD FOR SKYPE
and cellphones -yeah that was a good invention
with the whole thing about how it fits into your pocket
smart move
but still...

optimism pie, i need to take a bite
hell, i need a whole slice
actually, more like the WHOLE DAMN PIE

THATDREAM

that dream, i had it.
the one where you close your eyes and drift off to sleep
where all of a sudden you're moving through clouds then suddenly, you realize you're flying
kinda like the scene in the animated version of peter pan
where you're flying above everything you know:
the town you live in, the houses, all the buildings
the whole, "i can see my house from here!!"
the feeling is wonderful.
by being so free that you can do whatever you want
doing loops and flips, going fast and then just floating along
but when you wake up.....

well, its a great dream
you should have it sometime